Personal Prose Post

I haven’t posted recently because I’ve been obsessed with writing my second novel (more on that soon).  I need to say how really challenging it is to do the needed research, park myself in a chair for long hours on a daily basis, and know just how bad my first draft is.  But that’s a writer’s reality.

I was thinking about why I do this.  I have always written, and always wanted to write a book.  I have an academic manuscript sitting in a box in my garage.  I gave up after getting several rejections — how naive I was back in the 90s.  But I didn’t really want to write academic books.  I wanted to write novels.  But I couldn’t think of a plot. 

After struggling with this for several years, I finally decided that maybe it was time for me to focus my energies in a direction that was more fruitful.  Then, sitting in Quaker Meeting one Sunday, I had an idea.  How would God speak to the human race?  Through computers?  Phone lines?  No, I decided, it would be the way it had been done before — through writing on rocks. 

That led me to develop a short story idea, and I went away for a three day solo retreat to write the story.  I worked diligently on the idea, and just before leaving the retreat, I sat outside and enjoyed the warm spring air and trickling brook.  I was pleased with my story and mulling about where I would submit it.  Then I heard a voice inside me, saying … “This is too big for a story.  It needs to be a book.”

I was startled, not sure whether I was hearing from God or my own inner voice.  Regardless, I responded, “But I don’t know how to write a book.”  The answer:  “You’d better get started, then.”

I was speechless, and overwhelmed.  But I couldn’t ignore this strong voice telling me to turn the story idea into a book.  So I did.  I got started, learning to write fiction, learning about story arcs, about dialogue, about using setting as a character, chapter lengths.  You get the idea.  It was a huge undertaking, and took me three years and eight drafts, as well as a stint wih a developmental editor.  But the book is finished now, and you can read the first chapters on my web site. 

But I haven’t been able to find an agent or publisher, as yet.  So I decided, rather than continuing to struggle, to move on.  And here I am, learning with every word I write, and loving it (also hating it, wondering why I ever got myself into this thankless profession as I struggle to find the right words).  Still, I wouldn’t be any other place, or doing any other thing.  That conversation with a higher power changed the course of my life.   

I find myself wondering if other people have had experiences that changed their lives, especially as regards to writing.  Please let me know, okay? 

Posted in Writing | No Comments » | March 19th, 2010